Last night I was out with one of my sons. He volunteered to come along with me to get some soup since I'd been feeling under the weather. As we walked through the store, he offered to carry my groceries. Then he did the self-checkout for me and carried the groceries out to the car. When it came time to open the car, he offered to take the keys, opened the door, waited for me to get in, handed me the keys and shut the door.
It's so nice to have my young knight around.
Here's the thing; too often today we are not teaching our young men how to be gentlemen. Even more so; we don't always teach our young ladies how to be, well, ladies.
I've had a few conversations with different people about this lately. It just keeps coming up; don't know why, but enough that I thought I'd write about my thoughts on it. So, let's start with my boys...no, the girls...it's hard to decide.
I want my girls to want to be treated like a lady. Today's world is so much about empowering women. Women can do it all. Women are just as strong as men. Women don't need a man to take care of them.
And heaven forbid, we should actually teach our daughters how to cook and clean and take care of babies; because then we live in the dark ages and we are forcing our daughters to be less.
God created women with the gift of child bearing. What a gift! To be able to have that life inside of you; knowing only you have the ability to bond in that special way with this child during those precious months. Women have the ability to see a child and naturally want to take care of them; whether it is their own child or some one elses. That's how we are created! I'm proud to have been able to stay home and take care of my family for years. I love that I got to spend that time with them. I love those precious moments.
I've had other women tell me over the years:
"It's your time!" (I have plenty of time when my children are grown and gone.)
"You should be in school." (I'd rather be home and give my children a chance to go to school)
"It's not your job to be home; you should have a career." (I don't look at it as a job; I know it's an honor.)
"How can you stand being with your kids all day? I can't wait until mine are back in school again." (Wow!)
"Are you going to let your girls go to college and have a career?" (Really?)
Every one of these questions has been asked by a woman. Why is it ok for a women today to choose a career, but not ok for them to choose to stay home and take care of their family?
I've actually seen women get MAD at a man for opening a door for them because they can "do it themselves."
They are our natural protectors. That's they way they were created. I'll never forget when my children were younger, there was a boy in my daughter's group at church choir that kept picking on her. Each week this little boy would poke her in the back with a pencil. Fed up, she came home and burst into tears one day. The very next Sunday, all three of her brothers lined up outside the classroom door, prepared to have a word with this young man. No words needed; the boy never picked on her again.
Someone gives mom a hard time; my boys don't hesistate to line up on either side of me, arms folded across their chest, ready to take on whoever it is that is messing with me.
So let me tell you about my family and the way we work!
My boys know how to cook, wash dishes, do laundry and clean a house. But I'll admit, when the trash needs emptied, I will usually call on one of my sons to take it out. I also call on them to get the spider (or cockroach), and to lift something heavy for me. I'll admit that I bought them toy trucks to play with as children. I wait for them to open a door for me and I talk to them about making sure they take care of the women/girls in their life. I remind them that they are to protect them, love them and cherish them. I've talked to them about being prepared to take care of their families financially if their future wives want to stay home and how to work together as a team if their wives have a career. My husband fills up my gas tank every Sunday night. He opens doors and drives when we are together. He also helps with laundry, makes me dinner and cleans better than I do these days! He offers his arm or hand when we are out and makes sure to help me bring in the groceries. He is my my protector, loves me and cherishes me.
My girls can lift a suitcase, shoot a gun and work in the yard. They plan on going to college and having a career, but they also talk about motherhood and the children they'll have. They'll get rid of a bug in the house if they have to, but love that they can call on their brothers to do it for them. They had a kitchen and baby dolls to play with as children. I remind them that they should want to be protected, loved and cherished. And I teach them about loving and nurturing.
I believe in ladies and children first.
I believe in men being men and women being women.
I'm not ashamed to have been a stay at home mom for 15 years; yet I willingly took a full-time job to help support my family through these difficult time.
I love that my husband is an awesome stay at home dad while he starts his own business at the same time.
What we've taught our family together is to cherish what God has created us to be. We teach our children to love God, family and so on. We teach them to want to act like ladies and gentlemen. We also teach them that you do whatever it takes to make your family work together. Sometimes that means mom staying home; sometimes it means dad staying home. There is nothing wrong with either.
Personally, I'm proud of my knights and princesses!